As you can see it is composed of multiple characters meaning danger and opportunity. I think that this is really significant because with a crisis there is often some sort of danger and some sort of opportunity to grow closer with those around us.
A few years ago my family under went a huge crisis. We have a beautiful little dog named Crystal. We often called her Crissy for short or 'fat dog' because she was well fed. We all loved her a lot even though not all of the family are dog people.
During the summer we had decided to take a trip to Canada to visit my mother's side of the family. We weren't able to take her with us, so we left her with my father's parents. When we were driving back from Canada, our dog got out and tried to run back home. We were all distressed and in a state of panic. We were are all scared, worried, and concerned. Even my mother who is a cat person was dismayed because she realized that even though she said she doesn't like dogs she was like most of us, heartbroken. We were scared of the danger of losing her. We searched everywhere, let others know to look out for her, and posted lost dog papers around the areas we thought she might be. We had heard from some people that they thought they saw her in a certain area and had looked there a few times, but we still hadn't found her. It finally came down to Monday night and it had been ten days since she had gone missing. Any prospects that we had for finding her were dim and it seemed like she was gone forever. It was family home evening so we decided that this was the day. We were either going to find her or we weren't. So we knelt in family prayer. My little sister was very young at the time, but she began to say the prayer. As she spoke the Holy Ghost overwhelmed the room, and we knew that everything was going to be alright. Then we got in the van and headed over to the place where people had been saying they saw her. It was a big area of empty lots that were going to become a subdivision. However, the dirt still hadn't been smoothed out so it was a bit hilly and uneven. Earlier that day it had rained so now it was a bit muddy, but we spread out and we called, and called, and called for her. We had searched for a few hours when we felt like it was time to go; there was no hope left. Since it was muddy we had to scrape the mud off of our shoes before getting into the car. While we were scraping the mud off of our shoes, my dad shouted excitedly, "Crissy!" Naturally our dad was the joker of the house so we yelled at him and told him that it wasn't funny. However, our dad said, "No, it's really her!" We turned around to see Crissy standing there. However, we were no longer able to call her 'fat dog'. She looked incredibly skinny in so much that you could see her bones and her skin was sagging down. We were incredibly relieved to have her back and share the love again.
This is an example of a crisis that my family went through. Sometimes we consider crises to be a terrible thing that rips our relationships apart. However, they often provide a chance for our relationships to grow stronger and our bonds to be reinforced. As my family communicated together and conducted family counsels to solve the problem we were able to have stronger relationships and our bonds were reinforced. Every family will respond differently to crises.
A lot of times when we are going through crises we will say that we are 'coping'. The question is what really it coping? Coping is many things, but I will use the woodworking form. In wood working coping is when you shape pieces of woodwork to fit together in a molding. They use a coping saw.
It is a saw that has a very narrow blade stretched across a U-shaped frame, used for cutting curves in wood. Much like the coping saw is used to shape and define woodwork often creating beautiful pieces, crises can shape and define us, helping us to be even more beautiful.
However, just like there is a good side to things there is often a bad.
Bad sides of Crises:
- They can separate us
- There may often be little or no communication
- They can disconnect us
- They can lead us to doubt, shame, and blame
- They can cause distress
- They can cause self-blame and guilt
- They can cause people to complain
Good sides of Crises:
- They help us to support each other
- They can turn us toward our family
- They can help us to involve family members
- They can allow more frequent and more quality communication
- They can help us to empathize with others
- They can help us to express our emotions
- They can help us see that our problems don't last forever
- They can help us see that life is worth living
- They provide opportunities
I think that if we want to use our crises to become better we need to involve others and be involved ourselves. We need to communicate with others and allow them to communicate with us. I think that it can also be beneficial to counsel and 'cope' together. When we try and handle the situation separately it can separate and distance us causing strain on our relationship.
I think it is also really important to realize that stress isn't always bad. Even thought there is such a thing as distress, there is also eustress (meaning good stress). Without stress we become weak. For example, astronauts often develop brittle bones and muscle atrophy. Since they are not having to use their muscles and bones to support them they become weak and they often deteriorate. Without the stress of gravity their bones and muscles become so weak that they often deteriorate or become very brittle. Stress is important, because without it we become weak. Yes, crisis cause stress and may be dangerous, but they provide opportunities to grow, learn, and become strengthened. Therefore, although we may wish we never have crises or issues that cause stress, they are really important because of the opportunity for greater strength they provide.
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